Tuesday, January 4, 2022

This is not about Antonio Brown

I do not know Antonio Brown the NFL wide receiver, however his recent news making event and subsequent conversations on various radio sports shows etc has left me a bit upset.

We live in an every man for himself culture. There is still this mentality that we need to take care of ourselves and no matter what we do it is up to us to solve our own problems. In some cases that is true. If you want to have more money, work hard and save.. you do need to have some breaks, but generally your economic life will get better with some work, planning and discipline.

If you want to be successful in areas beyond economics, it is the same mindset. Mr. Brown worked hard and became successful in the NFL. This also helped him financially. What has happened to him over the last couple of years has become quite the conversation.

And one element I kept hearing over and over again yesterday, was if he needs help  he needs to ask for help. This is somewhat true and somewhat not true. Some people called in or some commentators made mention do people think Antonio Brown is affected by some type of mental illness. And basically all the national commentators said that if he needs help he needs to ask for it.

All of them have the same assumption. That he would understand he has some type of situation going on. Therein lies the problem. Many people that have issues do not know they have issues so how the heck are they suppose to know they need to ask for help. 

Everyone says the NFL offers help. And I am glad to hear it, yet again, calling 1-800-HELP or whatever means you know you need it. How does a person in a decline of some sort know they need help. In most cases, they don’t. So expecting them to ask for help is letting them down.

And this same argument goes for the homeless also. They should go get help. Sometimes they are so far down they do not know how to ask for help. Or that their situation is worth helping.

Go tell a drug addict or an alcoholic they have a problem and you will get a myriad set of excuses from them. The last thing they are going to do is go get help. Now I do agree for the help to work, the person needs to accept they need help and are willing to do what it takes to move forward. And anyone that says this is what they mean when they say they need to ask for help is on track to a point. And yes I agree that until an individual recognizes they have a problem and addresses it, no help will be beneficial.

The key difference to me is that someone needs to step up and start the process of identifying to the person there is a problem otherwise they will never know they have a problem. Sounds simplistic and it isn’t, yet until a person does something so stupid that it comes back at them like a ton of bricks, most people do not know when they need help. And it is beneficial if someone can get that individual’s attention long before the ton of bricks hits them so they can start addressing the problem before their life is ruined. 

So to ignore a situation and leave it up to the person because you feel it is up to them to solve their own problem you are doing them a disservice. 

Sometimes the problem is obvious to everyone else. Sometimes no matter what you do, you can never get their attention until it is too late. Sometimes though doing nothing is criminally negligent.

So it upset me to hear so many national personalities not even addressing the issue except to say if he doesn’t ask for help, he will not get better. And again, eventually an individual will need to own the problem to resolve the issue,  but ownership means you made an investment and that investment means you understand the capital that is at stake. If you do not understand what you are losing you will never ask for the help you may need. 

Sometimes you can watch the person fall apart right in front of your eyes or make horrendous mistakes and you try to tell them. Sometimes that is all that you can do, but to watch it without taking action is a failure.

We call ourselves a Christian nation, but is leaving a person’s failures only for them to solve a Christian attribute. People will say they are pro-life, but what exactly does that mean. Pro life means life is from conception to natural death with dignity of life.  Is watching a person fall so hard they suffer immensely or die a pro-life attribute? 

Conservatives say we need to pull ourselves up by our boot strap, be our own man, be self made men etc. They also say we shouldn’t rely on government help. That is isn’t the place of the government to control our lives or make decisions for us. And generally this works, but it is not the whole story.

Yet somewhere today a person will need help and the conservatives offer no solutions only to complain about government interference in our lives. Conservatives say we need to be self reliant to not put burdens on others. 

Yet realistically we burden society more when we ignore the suffering. Isn’t there a phrase waste not want not, or a penny saved is a penny earned or teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime. These same wonderful phrases that make up the backbone of conservative self reliance can be used to address the same problems of people needing help. 

For example an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. If we prevent problems do we not save the cost of paying for the aftermath? So why are people so afraid to help? Why do we rely on a broken person to fix them self?

If liberals are the only people offering solutions to problems, why do conservatives complain about the outcome?

I have no idea what caused Mr. Brown’s outburst on Sunday, yet the reaction to it shows the underlying problem that society has with dealing with issues head on. It is better to push off the problem than to address not only the problem but the root cause of the problem. I do not want to throw Mr. Brown under the bus, yet his example lets us know, do we ignore an entitled self serving person because it is easier or do we face the truth that there is more to the story than meets the eye and we (his family maybe) should look to the person and see if they are crying for help even though they have no idea they need help? 

I do not work in a mental health environment or deal with mental health issues, yet by chance I see the daily grind of how much mental health issues affect our society and the families directly. I cannot sit by and listen to people expect the pieces to magically come together because hey that is what they are supposed to do. 

If you really believe you are a conservative, then maybe you should be applying the age old adage, to love your brother as you love yourself. And yes, sometimes that takes effort.

No comments:

Post a Comment