Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Fighting another paranoid post


You know how it is.  A thought creeps into your brain, you hear something, then it finds a neuron to latch onto, a synopsis lights up, it finds another connection, the electrical impulses bouncing around gray matter find a path and the next thing you know your whole being is consumed by an ugly thought. One that won’t go away. It dominates every part of your brain, growing worse than weeds throughout every cortex it can find. You drink a glass of wine more like a shot of tequila and it is still racing within and throughout that part of your body you rely on for reasonable action.

Your eyes turn so white you belong in a Paul Ryan selfie, your heart races along at a clip to blow two or three valves, your nerves are so on edge just the slightest sound makes you jump; everything in your being is consumed.

Yeah, sure, the reality is happening: The Republicans are actually going to nominate Donald Trump for President. Surely this one fact alone can’t be causing all this anxiety. No, it isn’t. You hear things, read things and it just starts to add up in this hyper vigilant state your brain is functioning.

And all your worse fears start to play out at a rapid fire pace. You can’t keep up, but overall one theme dominates the process. All day long you fight it. Every waking moment is put to the effort to keep your worst fears pushed aside, yet they grow back stronger and stronger, now to the point where rational reflection of what you are thinking is buried under the rubble of too many brain cells fried from long ago. What you actually fear is coming true is more dynamic than any fiction you try to create.  The panting, the wide eyed stare at nothing is only some symptoms of the raging paranoia completely engulfing the space behind my eyes. Is there even a soul to look into at this point?

My God you scream, what are we doing? How on Earth can a rational well positioned country with the best well written idea of government ever devised by man be nominating, much less electing the most narcissistic, irrational, pseudo fascist, completely devoid of any idea of how he would run this country once elected individual for the highest office in the land? How did we come to this?

And oh by the way his competition is the biggest most dangerous corrupt politician ever conceived of in this country. She makes Richard Milhous Nixon look like a boy scout. Yes, she hides it well and the Democrats will be nominating her next week.

Oh, but, don’t let me stress you out. This is just a moment that the history books will never mention. Whomever wins will get to write their interpretation and all will be copasetic. So do not fret over me, once November comes and goes, people like me will disappear into the wild blue yonder never to be heard from again. Can’t be upsetting the apple cart now, can we?


And heck, this is the mild version of what I wanted to write. I glanced at a story this morning stating where one delegate from Virginia was in a situation with one of Mr. Trump’s campaign workers and had to ask: are you threatening me or my State?” Just who exactly is working for Mr. Trump?

And in the end, people like me are labeled the bad guys. Wake up America,     please.







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